In everyday life we often deal with difficult situations with children, which can be a very frustration thing. With these four steps it can help difficult situations with your child.
1. Stay Calm:
How? By staying calm you are able to think clearly and take your time to react appropriately. If you are becoming frustrated very quickly take a breath and count to ten before reacting. You need to look at the problem or task from the other individual’s perspective.
Example: When a child is not wanting to take a nap, you can first look at the situation from the child’s viewpoint of why. To the child you may have stopped them from something they really wanted to do. If you explain to them the reason behind the nap they are starting to learn why it is important. Lastly let them know that they will be able to continue the activity after their nap, by doing this they are more likely to respond in a positive manner.
2. Pick your battles:
How? Decide if choosing this battle is worth the time or energy, is it harmful to the individual, or can it help them at the present time.
Example: A child is getting ready in the morning, they want to be independent and put on their shoes by themselves. However, when you are walking out the door you realize that the shoes are on the wrong feet, at this point you have 2 options. Let it happen and put them in the car so you are not late for that event or tell them their shoes are on the wrong feet and it needs to be fixed. You need to think is this really worth the struggle?
3. Build them up:
How? Use positive language when dealing with your child. Instead of saying “no”, “stop”, or “that’s not okay” point out the positive.
Example: When a child is doing something that is not correct such as standing on the chair, instead of saying “No!” “Get off that!” “We do not stand on chairs that is bad”. You could use more positive terms such as “Please sit on your pockets, our feet belong on the floor”. By saying it in this manner it is more positive and the child does not feel like they are in trouble.
How? When a child is performing a negative behavior remove them from the situation and place their focus on something more positive.
Example: If you have two children playing together and they start to fight over a toy, you can redirect both children with a new game or different toys. Removing the root of the problem (toy) can change the environment from a negative into a positive. They can then focus their attention on having a fun experience together instead of the negative.
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-Baylee Midgley (Bravo Employee)